I want you
by dArKeNsHaDoWs
Summary: Severus Snape is reflecting on some memories involing a certain gryffindor.


**I want you**

I don't own the characters unfortunately I'm just borrowing them to create a little bit of magic. Characters belong to The amzing JK Rowling, and the song lyrics in italics belong to Bon Jovi.  
Reviews are greatfully appreciated and finally I hope you enjoy.

Severus Snape was hunched over in his old leather antique chair, swirling the old glass holding amber liquid in a clockwise motion, not for the first time, thinking of what a fool he was.

A forgotten Prophet lying at his side, an animated picture of a young woman in the arms of her beau.

'…Hermione…'

Memories bombarded his battered and old defences and he didn't have the strength to keep them at bay tonight.

_The last time I saw her _

_Was the night she said goodbye _

"You must leave, Miss granger, the battle is nearly upon us and I do not have time for your ridiculous notions!"

"After everything, your still pushing me away, because you love her, lilly. I know I will never compete with her Severus, but please-"

"Do not mention her name, for you know nothing of who I am and what I am capable of doing!"

"I know you have dedicated the last fifteen years to her memory and protecting her son!"

_She said that love's a stranger _

_And it's sure to pass you by_

"Lily was never destined to be yours, professor-"

"Get out! You foolish girl, you think me a hero?!" Severus approached Hermione at speed, towering over her, eyes ablaze with such anger; Hermione stumbled back slightly, till her back hit the concrete of the dungeons.

Severus leaned in, lips curling into a familiar snarl.

"I have served two masters, both manipulative, both killers, both believing in their own causes, and I was at their mercy. I killed the great Albus Dumbledore. I have many enemies Miss Granger and you would be wise to remember that I will be as much a target on the battlefield as the Dark Lord and your precious Potter. Do not be so foolish as to believe that your precious Potter and comrades would not hesitate in killing me."

Another memory the day of the battle:

Severus had just finished helping Colin Creevey and Neville Longbottom clear a pathway of death eaters when he heard a recognisable cackle coming from the edge of the grounds, turning towards the trio of people while keeping to the shadows, Severus's breath caught when he recognised the wild brown locks and battered profile of Hermione, taking up stance against the L'estranges.

'No, Hermione, please, run for goodness sake girl, you can't take them both on.'

Severus knew he had to bide his time and think quickly otherwise Granger wouldn't survive long.

"Ooo, look what I have found Rudophus!? The mudblood friend of Potter!" Bellatrix Lestrange cackled in excitement.

" Remember the last time we met mudblood? Remember my blade slicing your skin? How is the scar by the way? Would you like a repeat performance?"

Bellatrix shot a spell towards Hermione, slicing her left calf.

Severus held back a barely concealed growl, his thoughts moved from restraining the both of them to killing both in matter of moments.

Hermione stumbled at the intense pain, but still managed to cast a well- timed protego at Rudolphus, the force of it sending him hurtling into the tree trunk behind him.

Severus was impressed, 'That's my girl' but as soon as the thought flashed in his mind, he was moving as he heard Bellatrix scream, her eyes ablaze with such fury that both Severus and Hermione was sure this would be her end.

Time was moving too slowly for Severus as he watched as another slicing hex, his to be precise, sliced her stomach, leaving Hermione crumpling to the floor with a deep wound, bleeding out heavily on the edges of Hogwarts.

"….Severus….."

"Sectemsempra!" Severus shook with unconcealed rage as he shot a spell towards Bellatrix's form, only just catching the look of surprise, fear and intense pain as she collapsed to the frosted ground and bled out.

"Miss Granger, Hold on."

"Severus.."Severus could still remember the warmth of her blood on his pale hands, the slacking grip of her hand on his cheek. Severus began muttering the counter curse, over and over her body, her silent tears forever ingrained into his mind.

'Miss Granger, Hermione, I need to get you to the hospital wing, I'm sorry.' Severus winced as the woman in his arms cried out as he lifted her frail body, holding her close to his warmth.

"Severus…I love you…"

"Shh, my love, everything's going to be okay."

'You cannot die. You must not die.'

Another Memory:

A knock at his door, opened to reveal a bushy haired bruised but alive Hermione.

"I'm glad to see you out of the hospital wing."

"I should thank you Professor, you saved my life."

'You saved mine Hermione' " No need to thank me Miss Granger."

"Severus I-"

"Don't. please"

"But-"

Miss Granger you were in pain, things were said and –"

"Don't you dare, Severus Tobias Snape. I meant what I said! Before and After the Battle!"

"You're a mere child, how can you possibly know what 'love' is?!"

"You were in love with Lilly at my age were you not?"

"I-That is none of your business, Miss Granger!"

"Then don't say I do not know what love is! When I lay dying my final thoughts weren't of Harry and Ron, but my regret at not being able to show you that you are cared for, loved….by me."

" And I had to watch you fall! To see your precious blood pour out from a wound created by me! It was my fault! If I hadn't stayed hidden for so long, if I had reacted quicker then maybe….it's my fault. I didn't protect you just like I didn't protect her! I will not put you at risk, do you understand me!?"

Severus stared into the flames that were licking violently in the fireplace, lost to his memories, he could still see the tears that rolled off her pale, flawless cheeks.

_She wouldn't look me in the eye_

_But I could see a tear roll _

_Off her face_

"Miss Granger…"

"You called me Hermione, that night."

"…and I was Severus."

"Please..Severus..I-"

"No, Herm-Miss Granger, please, see reason. You're a young, smart, talented witch and you deserve someone that can give you the moon and stars, someone who is not broken."

_As we both tried so hard _

_Not to cry she said_

_I never wanted the stars _

_I never shot for the moon _

_I like them right where they are _

_All I wanted was you _

_So baby just turn away _

_Because I can't face the truth _

_All I'm trying to say _

_Is all I wanted was you_

"Severus…."

"Goodbye Hermione."

Severus threw the tumbler in his hand towards the wall, heavy breaths wracking his chest as unshed tears blurred his vision.

_I tried so hard to remember _

_Where when how why love went away _

_I tried to drown myself in pity _

_But the whiskey kept calling your name_

'Why couldn't I be selfish? Just once in my miserable existence?!'

_I bought you fancy cars and diamond rings _

_All the things that money brings _

_And the servants to paint the sky blue_

Severus's eyes caught the moving image to his left and once more picked up the daily prophet to see Hermione and Ronald Weasley, celebrating their engagement, the large expensive ring on her left hand, making his stomach knot.

_And I worked so hard seven days a week _

_And built a fortress for your heart to keep _

_If I could I'd wrap these words up for you_

'I'm too late, I pushed you away and now I have lost you. Too long I have spent living behind the lies and the fortress I have hidden my heart in'

A knock so familiar had Severus pausing for what seemed like an eternity before he approached the old rusted door of Spinners End, opening it to reveal a soaking wet Hermione Granger stood on his doorstep.

"Hermione, what-?"

"We aren't suffering anymore Severus, I won't let you hold back, take what you want, for the first time in your life Severus, it's right in front of you, just reach out and take it."

Severus hesitated for a split second before he crushed his lips to Hermione's, his right hand working his way into her soaked curls, his left gripping his waist, pulling her roughly forward before kicking the door shut, he pressed them backwards until she was backed up against the door and his body, Hermione's own hand coming to cup the side of his neck, the other pressed solidly against his chest over his heart.

Severus pulled back abruptly, breathless, to look at Hermione.

"What about Weasley, Hermione?"

"I handed him the ring back and explained we shouldn't settle for anything less than Love, we deserve that after everything. My heart has always belonged to you Severus."

"Are you sure Hermione? Is this what you really want? A battered, grumpy, old man that lives in a condemned, ruined house that has never been filled with love to call it a home?"

The love that Hermione had in her heart in that very moment penetrated Severus's soul. She wasn't some silly school girl with a school girl crush, here was a woman, that even though he had treated her poorly throughout her school life, turned her away twice while she laid her heart bare to him, came back to him, offering him a chance at love, at a life he never thought he was destined to have.

"Severus, that is exactly what I want. I just want you."

_All I got is my guitar these chords and the truth _

_All I got is my guitar ... but all I want is you_

_I never wanted the stars _

_I never shot for the moon _

_I like them right where they are _

_All I wanted was you _

_So baby just turn away _

_Because I can't face the truth _

_All I'm trying to say _

_Is all I wanted was you_

Severus nodded and claimed her lips once more, feeling the joy, love and passion rolling of the two of them.

Items of clothing were peeled away from their bodies, slow, loving caresses eliciting deep and feather light whispers in the shadows of the dancing embers. Confessions shared between two hearts.

"You, Hermione. I want you. Always."


End file.
